Over 50% of teens and adolescents have experienced cyberbullying. A staggering statistic. Today, I’d like to delve deeper into our state of mind and emotions around something that has become an epidemic in the world of new technology. I will do this by looking at three things and chaining them together – self-belief, how to control emotion, and lastly, positivity and how it improves your skill to cope with cyberbullying. The goal is to help you establish a wall between you and the person trying to affect your life.
One of the most powerful things in the world is believing in one’s ability to perform particular tasks. Think about the time and effort you put into doing something. As a guitar player, the more you understand and play your instrument, the greater the chance you have of making beautiful music. You spend hours learning the different notes and how they harmonize together, your dedication to making mistakes until you get it right. It shows when you pour blood sweat and tears into the very cords that make up your guitar. While, being faced with the moments where you wanted to quit and move on because you think you not good enough when you built the courage to come back, and finally making your very first instrumental piece. All of this, a huge rollercoaster ride that you know you have to restart all over.
I tell you this not to discourage you. I tell you this to show you all the work you put into your craft, and then I have a question for you. Are you going to tell me you did not believe in yourself? Are you going to let all the work and time spent on your craft be crumbled when someone is negative towards you? You can’t allow the negativity of others to break your spirit, because the truth is you do believe in yourself; look at the work you put in. If you still don’t believe in yourself, the best way to solve this is to apply yourself in an area you find enjoyable and stay confident. How do you stay positive? I’m glad you asked. It starts with learning to control your emotions…
Control your emotions
As stated in Cyberbullying: What You Need to Know if You’re Being Cyberbullied think before you send something. Even if it’s not hurtful, it may impact the other person’s life in an unknown way that you cannot foresee. I would like to expand on this idea a little further because emotional responses are so explosive. It’s always better to step away from the scenario, disengage and give yourself some time to think. This not only enforces the control of emotions, but it helps you assess the situation from an objective standpoint where you are calm and collected.
In an article written by Dr. Carmen Harra titled “6 Steps to Controlling Your Emotions” she states “Wisdom means being able to see past the moment and discern the greater meaning of any given situation.” Powerful words that hold true to their meaning. Hindsight is always 20/20, but why should it always be after the events play out? Why can’t the reflection come before the action? We are not always able to see that we need to reflect on the situation before acting out so we can practice doing this by finding a healthy outlet. You could do this by speaking to a friend or someone you trust and recalling the events. This allows you to get another person’s opinion and point of view. This brings us to the effects of positivity.
Power of Positivity
There is an article by the name of “3 Powerful Ways to Stay Positive” written by Travis Bradberry, PH.D. that brings up a very powerful way to gain an optimistic mindset. The process is called cultivating an attitude of gratitude. Essentially, when things become pessimistic or negative in your life, use that as a trigger to get your mind thinking about positive elements in your life.
What are you grateful for? Who are you grateful for? A success or accomplishment you received … all of these encourage optimistic thinking. There is also a theory of habit that states if a person does an activity for 21 days it becomes habitual in nature. The science is not exact, however; the concept still holds – after doing something for a long period of time it has a greater chance of becoming habitual. So, when dealing with negativity or harassment online, take your mind and move it to encouraging thoughts. It will help you reduce stress in your life and allow you to react with a calm mind.
In sum, there is a lot of negativity out there online, but not all hope is lost. There is indeed a way to combat the effects of cyberbullying. Remember, believe in who you are because you are so much more than you give yourself credit for. Learn to control those powerful emotions that make you lash out and retaliate in the wrong way, and lastly, remain confident because having a positive mind means you will have a productive vibe in life.
Contributed by Free2Luv Advocate Michael Scotten