Cyberbullying is Real. Identify. Protect. Empower Yourself!

Has anyone typed or texted you a message that made you feel uncomfortable or ashamed, and they refused to stop? What about gossip or hurtful comments? Has anybody targeted you on social media? These are a few clear indicators that you’ve been bullied. People who cyberbully go to great lengths to spread negative and hurtful content online, even as far as creating fake social media accounts. There are thousands of fake social media accounts out there – many for hurting people. Whenever you go to grab your phone, log onto your social media or chat online, you shouldn’t have to experience pain or feel threatened. If these negative feelings are associated with your digital experience, chances are you’re being cyberbullied, and you don’t deserve that. 

With ease of access to the internet and social media and our phones in our pockets, many of us are bombarded with pings, alerts, texts, and comment notifications  24/7. Within all of that noise lies the potential for anyone to digitally strike back or lash out at someone for their beliefs, their lifestyle, or their ideas. Even if it’s a “small” comment or you’re retweeting a rumor, it’s still cyberbullying and can have a strong, negative impact. 

How is cyberbullying real?

Cyberbullying is real and can occur in many different ways and can happen anytime and anywhere, and it occurs when someone deliberately sets out to hurt you online or through text messages. 

Examples of cyberbullying include: 

•       Sending, sharing or posting nasty, hurtful or abusive messages or emails
•       Humiliating others by posting/sharing embarrassing videos or images
•       Tagging someone inappropriately in an image
•       Spreading rumors or lies online
•       Trolling – saying means things to stir people up
•       Imitating others online
•       Making threats towards another person
•       Excluding others online
•       Online peer pressure
•       Repeated harassment and threatening messages (cyberstalking)

How to prevent and protect myself from cyberbullying

You don’t have to face cyberbullying alone, and there are ways to help prevent and protect yourself from being cyberbullied. 

• Reach out and let someone know what you are experiencing. It is important to know that you aren’t alone, and you don’t have to suffer in silence. And although it might be difficult, please tell someone you trust. Teachers, school administrators, counselors, parents, and police officers can help you with cyberbullying.
•  Block the person. Most social media sites have the option to block people, which means they won’t be able to contact you or see your page. If they’re texting you, adjust your phone settings to stop communication. You have the power not to engage.
•  Screenshot the mean messages you get. If you can show these messages to a trusted adult, it’ll be a lot easier to reveal the person behind those mean comments. It’s possible that you can be cyberbullied by someone living in another city, another state, or another country. Saving those messages gives others the chance to stop the problem at the root.
• Report harassing comments, fake profiles, or inappropriate photos to the site. Almost any website or social media site will have rules against cyberbullying and harassment. By reporting your negative online experiences to website managers and internet safety managers, the people behind the cyberbullying can be removed from the site. You have a right to feel safe in these spaces, and don’t worry about the person doing the cyberbullying finding out it was you who reported them. Reporting is usually anonymous.
• Don’t respond back to the comments. It might be tempting to respond, especially with a mean or nasty comment, but please don’t engage with them as this could only intensify their attack on you. Sometimes, they might just be wanting to get a reaction from you, and by not responding to them, you help to take away their power. 
• Be careful of what you post online, especially photos. Remember that anything you post online could be found by someone who wants to try and hurt you.
• Do an internet search of yourself. With an online search of your name, you may be able to find if someone has created a fake account using your name. Unfortunately, it’s not uncommon for those who cyberbully to create fake accounts in your name to post malicious things that then look like it came from you. If you find a fake account in your name, contact the website administrators to have it removed.
• Keep your passwords private. Never share your passwords, private photos, or personal data (such as address or phone number) online, not even with friends.

What NOT to do when you’re cyberbullied

To help prevent the cyberbullying problem from escalating, there are a few things you should not do. 

•      Don’t start cyberbullying them or anyone else. Retaliating against them only fuels their fire and may cause you additional and unwanted problems. 
•      Don’t forward the messages or other content. If you get a cyberbullying message, picture, or video, don’t forward it to your friends because this will just expand the problem. Anything electronic has the potential to be found in the hands of an unlimited amount of people. It’s safer to just not engage. 
•     Don’t believe the person. Those mean messages are meant to hurt you and your self-esteem, and you don’t deserve that. Many times, if someone is bullying you, know that their actions are not about you. They may be suffering from low self-esteem, being bullied themselves, or acting out for attention.

How can you tell if someone else is being cyberbullied?

The best way to help a child or anyone being cyberbullied is to know the signs and what to look for. Here are 6 clues that may suggest your child (or someone you know) is being cyberbullied: 

• Noticeable increases or decreases in device use, including texting.
• They exhibit strong emotional responses (laughter, anger, upset) to what is happening on their device.
• They hide their screen or device when others are near and avoid discussion about what they are doing on their device.
• Social media accounts are shut down or new ones appear.
• They start to avoid social situations, even those that were enjoyed in the past.
• They become withdrawn or depressed, or lose interest in people and actvitities. If you know someone who is getting cyberbullied, remind them that haven’t done anything wrong to deserve it, and ask them what you can do to help find a solution. Encourage them to not strike back but to instead reach out to a trusted adult. Most of all, be supportive and compassionate; it can make all the difference to them! 

  Thankfully, there are more and more people and organizations standing up and against all forms of bullying, and we’re one of them. We invite you to stay connected to our mission and our blog as we delve deeper into topics related to cyberbullying – something that has become an epidemic in the world of new technology.